Getting Ready for EMDR or IFS? Here Are a Few Coping Tools to Try First
Hi there,
I’m so glad you’re here.
If you’re reading this, chances are you’re thinking about starting trauma therapy—maybe EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing), maybe IFS (Internal Family Systems), or maybe you’re just curious about what healing could look like for you.
As a therapist who’s fully human (yes, I have my moments), I want you to know something important: you don’t need to be “fixed or perfect” before starting trauma work. You can bring your whole self. Having a few grounding tools in your pocket can help you feel steadier, calmer, and more in control as we start this powerful healing process.
So, here are a few gentle practices to help you prepare your nervous system and create more stability in your life:
Find Your Breath
Sounds simple, right? But your breath is one of the fastest ways to calm your nervous system. Try this:
Inhale for 4 counts
Hold for 4 counts
Exhale slowly for 6–8 counts
Repeat a few times
Imagine you’re exhaling like you’re blowing bubbles—soft and slow. It helps shift your body out of “fight-or-flight” and into a place of safety.
Create a Safe Place Inside
Before we dive into trauma memories or inner parts, it's helpful to have an inner sanctuary. In IFS, we might visualize a calm, peaceful place where your “Self” energy can meet your parts gently.
Try this:
Close your eyes and picture a space where you feel completely safe (real or imagined—a cozy blanket fort, the beach at sunset, your childhood treehouse).
Fill in the details: colors, textures, smells, sounds, tastes, physical sensations.
Visit this place often in your mind. Let it become familiar and soothing.
Build a Routine That Feels Grounding
Stability in daily life supports stability in therapy. Think: consistency, nourishment, and enough sleep (I know—easier said than done!). Here are a few grounding routines you might try:
Morning stretches with your favorite playlist
A cup of tea and quiet time before bed
A short walk each day with your senses engaged (notice what you see, hear, smell, and feel)
Trauma healing is deep work—tiny routines act like anchor points to return to.
Get to Know Your Parts (Without Judging Them)
IFS helps you understand your internal system—your parts. You might have an anxious part, a perfectionist, or even a numb protector who’s helped you survive. Try gently journaling:
“Who’s showing up for me right now?”
“What is this part worried about or trying to do for me?”
“What would it need to feel a little safer?”
You’re not trying to change your parts, just get curious about them. No fixing. Just kindness.
Co-Regulation
Sometimes we can’t calm down alone—and that’s normal. We’re wired for connection. Reach out to someone who feels safe to your system. A hug, a phone call, or just being in the same room as someone who feels steady can help your body feel regulated.
Starting trauma work takes courage. It’s okay to go slow. It’s okay to take breaks. It’s okay to feel overwhelmed sometimes—to pause and then to still keep going.
You don’t need to be perfect or "ready" to begin. You just need a little curiosity, a little self-compassion, and support along the way.
If we work together, we’ll go at your pace. I’m here for you.
Warmly,
Katrin
